Her name is Lydia

During our last official women’s bible study last night I saw a person walk by the windows. One of the other women in the study got up to see who it was. It was a woman. Often times people come to our church looking for the weekly AA meetings that meet in the other building, the Mormon church next door, or just because they aren’t sure what people are doing at the building. She was just walking by because she saw lights in the building were on. She was homeless. It was FREEZING outside last night, so we invited her in to join us for our discussion that night. She came in. I don’t know if she genuinely wanted to join us, or if she wanted to come in because the room was warm, and it was a safe place for her to be. Either way, it doesn’t matter why she was in the room, it was just nice that she was willing to sit in a room full of strangers and listen to us talk. She sat the entire study and was quiet the whole time. She calmly sat there and didn’t really move a whole lot either. She was an Ethiopian woman, and she had a heavy accent, so I’m not sure if she understood what we were talking about most of the time because of the language barrier. But it looked like she was enjoying listening nonetheless. 

So the study ended and we ended with prayer requests that we wrote down and exchanged with one another to pray for each other during the week. I got Lydia’s. Lydia prayed for safety from danger, and that her faith in God would go smoothly. I’m not sure what that really means, but I think that she was trying to say that she wanted to stay connected with Him, to rely on Him for her needs. She amazed me. She had no where to sleep last night and asked if she could stay at the church and sleep in the warm building. We couldn’t let her because of the alarm system, and there was no one else to stay there with her. We all felt terrible about it. So she said she probably wouldn’t sleep that night and would just walk around because it was too dangerous to fall asleep outside. Other homeless people steal their belongings (she had a shopping cart full of blankets and other things). We made some phone calls to try to find her a place, and promised to leave a note on the door with any information that we had found for her. We had to send her away though as we all left the church last night. We gave her $25 for food, and I found two protein shakes in the fridge at the church. I figured at least she would get some nutrition to tide her over in the cold weather until she could find some decent food to eat. Her presence is not what amazed me. I’ve seen and talked to countless numbers of homeless people, so that is not new to me. What was new is that she wasn’t worried about life. She was asking us what we did for Thanksgiving, and smiled when we said we spent it with family. She enjoyed hearing us speak about our lives, and always told us that life is simple and God takes care of everything, and that is why she was going to be okay. In comparison to my life, I would say that her life isn’t okay at all. I could see my breath leaving the church last night and my fingers and toes were almost numb by the time I got to my car. 

I want to help her. The most I did last night was give her $5, and a couple of nutritional shakes. But she needs more than that. She said that she would come back on Sunday (she was there the previous Sunday as well). I was thinking of coming up with a basket of food that she can eat throughout the week or something like that because I can’t pay rent for her, and I can’t provide a place for her to stay. But I need to come up with something. Something to show that she is loved.

15 down, 0 to go

How can this be? A typo? 15 down?? Already?? Just two blog posts ago, the count was 1 down, 14 to go. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have officially completed my preceptorship at the hospital and have only a few items standing between me and graduation. The reason why you have not heard of any exciting updates via blog is because clinical days took the best of me for awhile. Among the blog, other things were neglected in my life such as my home, my dog, my husband, my friends, and any social outlet available to me. Free time has been spent expending no energy, and not thinking about school. But now that the amount of time I have available to me has drastically changed, so will the way in which the way that I spend that time. 

Now that 15 shifts, 120 hours, and countless amounts of charts have been completed during my preceptorship, I’m still unsure of the exact reason why I was put in a med/surg position and not labor and delivery like I had hoped. Other than the obvious reason that med/surg is more applicable to my board exam in the near future, I can’t pinpoint an ‘ah-ha!’ moment of truth as to why I was placed where I was. I’m okay with not knowing for now. Maybe reasons will be revealed to me over time. Like a surprise ending or something like that. I do enjoy surprises. While I was not discovering the reason behind the placement, I did learn quite a few things while I was working on the floor. I have accomplished blood draws, IV starts, injections of many medications, wound dressing changes, bed pan changes, nice patients, mean patients, crying patients, large patients, nasogastric tubes, catheters, urinals, diapers, vomit, smells of all things imaginable, time management, crisis, laughing, and smiling. I’m sure there are more things to add to the list, but I think that the most important thing that I came away with from finishing all of those shifts is that I still enjoy doing everything a nurse does. It may not be the most pleasant task all the time, but it is a challenge, and people need help. I saw a woman so sick, that I thought she was going down hill quickly, get well over a period of 3 weeks. That made taking care of her when she was so sick beforehand worth it. I cannot remember everything that happened in the 15 shifts that I worked, but I do remember making each one of my patients smile. It is my goal every shift to make each patient that I take care of smile at some point during their care. Smiling makes people feel better, heal fast, and have a better attitude about being in the hospital and getting well! Most of the time I make them smile when they ask me how old I am. They ask me, “How old are you?” And even though I do not enjoy this question because I think in my head that they will write me off the minute I tell them that I am 24, I usually answer sarcastically that “I’m 12 and a 1/2.” That answer usually gets a laugh out of them and then they don’t ask me anymore how old I am. One point for me!

So now that I am done with clinical, I am confident that I am in the right field. I love helping people, and I love seeing them smile. It is the best! I now will try to make people in my life smile. Starting with my husband. Our house is a disaster, and it is my goal to get it in an acceptable order and make Robert smile. I will then move onto other people that I love and try to make them smile too. Time to start living life with a smile on your face. Let me know if you need one, I’ll be glad to assist you in making that happen!

Listen, and wait

I found a piece of paper that I had written on from one of my devotional times a few months ago. I go through periods of being really good about sitting down, reading scripture, and writing out how I think it is applying to my life, or how I need to model daily living after it, and other times, not so good at doing that. I’ll type it all out here, just because I think that it is a powerful message that needs to be taught to me probably every day. And maybe someone else will benefit from my crazy brain’s way of processing and thinking too. 

Acts 1:1-8 (go read it!)

Be a witness and wait for God’s timing. Two simple commands with simple responses, and yet they are so difficult to carry out daily. So many times I act and decide things without without waiting for God to give me the green or red light. I live in a world that desires results, and the results we want, now! This is difficult to overcome because I must defeat myself and join God’s team and discover his plan for me instead of relying on the plan I have for myself. I want to be done with school, I want to have a fantastic relationship with my husband, friends, and family, I want those in my life to know Jesus, I want to be a mother, a nurse, and do everything without fail, but because I am not without sin, these things come as God allows them when I am ready, willing, maybe unwilling, and maybe prepared for a challenge. Be still, and listen are my goals for this week. Be still, listen, and use my words, my actions and my body as a witness for God. I cannot be a witness without being in touch with my relationship first. Be still, listen, and wait.

1 down, 14 to go

Last Friday night was my first night shift of my preceptorship at VMC. After all was said and done, I was completely exhausted and rolled into my driveway just shy of 12:00 midnight. My goodness, this preceptorship is going to be a little more difficult than I had anticipated. This is a little peak into what I experienced that night. Get report, hit the ground running. Assessments, medication administration, contact precautions, smelly homeless man, 800 pound man, injections, IV medications, amputated leg man, HIV man, post c-section woman, more injections, help use the urinal man, nasogastric tube woman, coded girl, more injections, chart, chart, chart, run, run, run, wash hands, wash hands, more injections. Break. Repeat cycle. At VMC they have a paper system for charting which makes the night even more difficult because there is paper everywhere!! If all of their charting was on a computer, everything would pop up at you to tell you what you need to check, how often, what meds were due to be given and so forth. With paper, you have to check every side of every paper, and make sure that you sign everything, and since I am a student, I have to have everything co-signed, since I am not licensed. It is quite a feat. 

I have realized though that this rotation will better equip me to take the NCLEX at the end of school. I will encounter more real life situations, lab values, insulin injections, and vital signs that will show up on the test than many of my other classmates will. The events will be fresh in my mind and I will hopefully be better able to pass the test! 

I did have a few opportunities to start some IVs during my shift, but since the night was nonstop and so busy, I didn’t feel like it was a good time to do one of those again. It was a little overwhelming on the unit Friday night, and I’m certain that there will be more opportunities for IV starts as my shifts continue, so that will be the next task at hand. IV starts and keeping track of all of the charting that I have to do. I just hope I don’t forget to sign everything that I am supposed to be signing and double checking and everything else! I am grateful though for the nurse that I am under. She has been on this particular unit for a few years and is knowledgeable about everything that happens at VMC. She is also patient with me as I remember how to draw up multiple types of insulin, assess patients, administer IV push medications, and everything else that I need to remember from a year and a half ago when I was on this type of unit. 

There are many stories to be told of my first night on the floor in a long time, but I will spare the details, unless they are wanted. Some things that happen are really unpleasant, and some things that happen are funny. I was so tired when I got home on Friday night, but Robert and I didn’t go to bed until almost 1am because I was excited to tell him all about my night. 14 more to go, which sounds like an incredible number left, but I am certain that they will occur quickly, and soon, I will be counting down the days until I walk across that stage in cap and gown, with a bachelors degree. Almost there, almost done.

No luck, but have a positive attitude!

That is the phrase that was told to me yesterday when sharing the news that I would not be switched off of the surgical floor onto something more my style. “No luck getting switched, but I want you to have a positive attitude about it!” I really have no other option except to be positive about it because if I have a bad attitude, the experience will just be dumb for me. So instead of being bummed that I’m on a floor where the basics are practiced, I will instead be the best. From bummed to best in less than 5 seconds. That is where my attitude is at. If I can’t help women bring children into this world, then I will be the best at starting IVs. If I can’t help a little child not be afraid of me when I bring him his medicine, then I will be the best at reducing my patient’s pain, and increasing their comfort levels. If I cannot hold the tiny fingers of a struggling baby, and help its parents cope with the illness of their newborn child, then I will be the best at helping adults recover and get sent home from surgery. If I can’t do what I actually want to do, then I’ll be the best at what others have put in front of me. I am obviously on this unit for a reason, because God allowed it to happen. He put me on a surgical floor instead of labor and delivery, and I suppose I just have to wait to figure out why He did that. He must be using me for something good, something real real good. In the meantime, instead of reviewing stages of labor, and baby vital signs,  I have to get out my med-surg book and look up lab values, adult vital signs, and how to insert a catheter…. The adventure of nursing school continues, and although it has taken a turn that I had not expected, I’m sure that there will be some great stories to tell at the end of it all, and hopefully a job opportunity waiting for me too!

3rd times the charm??

I wonder if THIS time I will get the clinical placement that I want. Try #1: apply for semester 8 and write down the departments in order of which you would like them. Labor & Delivery, Pediatrics, NICU, and Mother Baby, and which one is the lucky winner?? Nothing! Try #2: Email instructors and express frustration of not knowing placement, and the response back is that I am unlikely to be placed in L & D like I had hoped. Try #3: Show up to clinical conference today, find out that I am at VMC, surgical floor 3, cry during conference (maybe the tears will convince SOMEONE that I need to be in something other than a surgical floor!). Get instructor to plead and beg to find me a clinical placement with the people in charge of this whole ordeal….won’t get results of try #3 until later this week, or possibly next Wednesday at the latest. Until then, I will attempt to enjoy the entire week off from school until next Wednesday. This is the last push for me to be in a department that I truly desire to be a part of this semester, and after this I will not try anymore to get what I want, and finally accept being on a surgical floor. I know it will be good experience, its just not what I pictured for my last rotation as a nursing student. And here is my reminder, the factor that continues to remind me that I am in God’s hands and He will use me as He sees fit: Jeremiah 29:11.

Today…Don’t waste it!

“You only know today that you have right now. Don’t waste it.” I read this statement from another blog today. Also, while talking with one of my clients on a home visit today she told me that she does not bother to not get along with people because it wastes and uses negative energy. And Jeremiah 29:11 was referenced to me by my lovely Mother when I was having a hard day earlier this week. Each of these reminders came at a different point in my week. This was the week marking the beginning of the end of my college career. I was nervous for my clinical placement (which hospital and department I would be in), and for this week to finally be here. I don’t know life without school. I have ALWAYS been in school, sometimes even winter or summer session (but then I got smart and utilized my breaks). During school I have almost always got into the classes that I wanted, with the teachers that I wanted, and with the friends that I wanted. Strike one, two, and three occurred this week with hospital, instructor, and friends. None worked out the way that I saw them working out in my head. Nothing is how I pictured my last semester to start. I’m not at the hospital that I would like to be at, I’m not too sure about my instructor, and the not all of the friends that I would like are in the class with me. This is where the patience, contentment, and prayer for a better attitude kick in. In reality, I will still graduate from nursing school on December 20th, I will get through papers, lectures, and getting to class on time. I will perform at the hospital to the best that I can, and maybe do some kissing up to the manager of the floor to get me a job when all is said and done. I WILL make it. I however am a planner, and nothing has gone according to the plan so far. Yes, its only been the first week, but first impressions are a big deal and, so far, semester 8 has a very bad first impression. Praying that as the semester continues, it only gets better from here, because from where I can see now, it can’t get much worse. I’m hoping to get my placement soon so that I can start preparing for the department I will be in, and not look silly to those that I am trying to give my best first impression to. For now though, I am grateful for the weekend, for the ability to spend time with friends and family and to finally come to the conclusion that it is out of my hands. I will let the school of nursing do what they do, get me a placement and I will enjoy it. I cannot control it, so I will have a better attitude about it instead. Happy hearts make happy nurses!

In the middle of the rainbow

Two and half years ago I started nursing school. It began with receiving a letter in the mail announcing my acceptance into the School of Nursing at San Jose State University. This was the beginning of the rainbow for me, the start of the nursing program was first being accepted. The program was 3 years long and promised to test me in almost every way possible. The first semester is just learning, no hands on with real people yet. The second semester is the first experience in the hospital. My friends Jayme and Angelica joined me in this adventure, and here is the first day of clinical picture to prove it! As you can see we are excited in this picture for the hospital that awaits us…did I mention that this picture was taken between 5:30 and 6:00 am? Oh the day shift! This is the clinical though that made us into the nurses that we would become at the end of this program. This clinical set the bar high and we learned skills that not many other students did not learn. Each semester presented its challenges and new skills to learn, and difficult patients to deal with, but each semester so far has been a growing experience. I know things now that most people wouldn’t even believe. I am not grossed out by blood and guts, and actual find joy in cleaning out a wound and putting exciting band-aids on people just for fun. I have learned to be sensitive to people with medical needs because our bodies are complex and can be scary if there is something wrong, but they are not sure what it is. I have learned that sometimes there is nothing that you can say to comfort someone, and instead you can only hold their hand, or touch their shoulder. I have learned how to give a shot, and to warn patients when they are coming. I have learned how to deal with people who have mental problems out in the public (sometimes a frightening experience…I know!). I have learned that I LOVE helping mother’s deliver their babies, its one of the most amazing things that anyone can ever experience. The pot of gold at the end of the rainbow will be found on December 20th, 2009. For now, I am still in the middle of the rainbow, waiting to find that gold, the goal, the prize for learning, testing, and crying my way through nursing school. It has been quite the journey, and although people my age have already been done with college for a year and a half now, it is my turn. My turn to be finished, to wear that cap and gown with my peach colored tassel, and feel accomplished. My friends and I have certainly earned our stripes as students, and its almost time to go out into the real world where no one will be holding our hand, except for our patients. Here’s to the home stretch before I find my pot of gold waiting for me at the end of a very long rainbow.

Today’s Smile

I went to the gym today (woo hoo!) and while I was sweating on the eliptical machine I hear someone’s voice singing. I thought, wow, they really need to change this radio station because this person is singing so flat! But then I realized it was the woman behind me on the treadmill and she had her headphones on and was singing along to her music out loud. I could see her in the mirrors in front of us and she was totally in her own element. It was so cute because she was singing “He’s got the whole world in His hands.” She didn’t sing all of the parts though, only some of them. She sang about the itty bitty babies, and you and me brother/sister being in His hands. I actually liked listening to her sing, it was funny and nice at the same time. She soon got off the treadmill and my entertainment and distraction from what I was actually doing had ended. I always forget to bring my ipod loaded with my N’Sync on it to the gym, so I watch the tv screens and wonder what Pastor Ken was preaching on during Sunday morning service (they record them and show them at the gym). I try to figure it out, but it never works…so I will bring something so that I can listen to him preach…it will past the time of treadmill doom and I’ll get a little Jesus in me while I’m there.

Excuse me Mr. TMJ, you are not welcome here

Apparently I have TMJ. When this began I do not know. Also, this is not a medical diagnosis by someone with an M.D. behind their name, but rather diagnosed by someone with an MRS. in front of her name. Yes, MRS. almost nurse Campos has diagnosed herself with TMJ. Jaw pain, caused by grinding my teeth during my deep nightly slumbers has led me to this diagnosis. How do I know that I grind my teeth you ask? My lovely husband tells me this is true because he is often woken up by the SOUND of me grinding my teeth. It grosses me out to think about it. What a horrible sound! Instead of a beautiful calmly sleeping wife laying next to him, he has this beast of a wife that  grinds her teeth to the point that it is audible! My goodness, I must not be messing around because that is some serious teeth grinding going on. So this has led to my jaw aching and throbbing for the past 3 or 4 days. I thought that a little Advil would do the trick, but it has yet to help. So I’m throwing some magnesium, and a snazzy new mouth guard into the mix and will hopefully get some results. I feel like a dork that has to wear headgear or something when I put this blue apparatus into my mouth, but I do not care if it makes me look like a chipmunk if it will make the pain go away. I have had my share of mouth issues, mainly because my mouth is the smallest mouth I have ever seen someone have, so dentists and mouth people practically destroy it whenever there is work to be done. I will try these remedies first before seeking medical attention for the issue, and obtain dental insurance in the meantime…Robert’s new job does not provide it. Then when it hurts no longer, I will visit that dreaded dentist and make my dental hygiene friend Kelly proud by getting a good report. I probably have nightmares about going to the dentist because I despise it so much, so having issues with anything to do with my mouth is like punishment for me. I would rather break my leg then to have issues with my mouth. Writing about it is making me clench my jaw, which is making it hurt more, so I will write no more. Hoping for the best when morning comes, and crossing my fingers that my new blue night guard will do wonders!